Monday, February 17, 2014
Starting Over Again..
"Andito sya. Gusto ko malaman kung bakit kami magkikitang muli." - Ginny, Starting Over Again (Star Cinema, 2014)
January 19, 2014 nung makita ko yung trailer nung movie. I feel inlove with the movie, agad agad, kaya sinabihan ko na agad si Anya, Jecai at CJ na papanoorin namin ‘to, sakto sa Valentine’s Day.:)
January 29, 2014, 10 days after, nagkita kami ni Jeff, ng hindi inaasahan. Matagal na kami hindi nagkikita, yung totoong kita, yung may kwentuhan, bilang magkaibigan. Nagkakasalubong kami paminsan sa mga SFC gatherings pero pinipili kong wag syang pansinin. Mas okay na sigurong walang nakakaalam na minahal ko sya bukod sa mga taong matagal na kaming kilala at sa mga taong malapit sa akin.
Tulad ni Ginny, natanong ko din sa sarili ko ‘to. For weeks, nagugulo ako ng tanong na yun. Mahirap sagutin. Lalo pa at may gf sya, tulad ni Marco sa movie na yun. Pero nasagot na kahapon (Feb. 15, 2014). Nanood na kami ng Starting Over Again, kaso wala si CJ kasi nasa CDO sya for the SFC ICON.
Minsan, kailangan mo ulit makita ang taong minahal mo sa nakaraan mo para magkaroon kayo ng closure. On my part, I believe kaya nagkita kami ulit kasi kinailangan ko na marealize na hindi na sya para sa akin. Kailangan ko na bitawan yung lahat ng nararamdaman ko sa kanya.
Palagi kong sinasabi, okay lang ako na hindi nya ako mahal, basta mahal ko sya, na hindi ako nasaktan ng nagkagirlfriend sya, na masaya pa nga ako kasi nagmamahal na sya. That’s not all true. At the back of my mind, in my heart, I am still hoping that he will learn to love me too, that eventually, he would realize that I was the one for him, nasaktan akong hindi ako ang nakagawa ng paraan para bumukas yung puso nya. I will regret not making him feel how much I love him. I will always love him. Pero sabi nga ni Marco, “I will always love you, but in a different way now.”
Nung nakita ko sya ulit. Bumalik lahat ng nararamdaman ko sa kanya, kasama pati kahihiyan at galit ko sa sarili ko. He is, really, that one guy, that can bring out everything in me, the best, including the worst in me. So maybe, it’s time to really let go of that love.
Just now, I unfriended him.Hindi pa kasi ako okay eh. I may be okay someday. Someday, just not now. I’m still thinking of disconnecting from other people connected with him but I think me and him, we’re always going to be connected because we are in the same community.
Someday, I’m going to meet the right person and I’m going to love him right.
And now I’m starting over again. I’m not saying I’m ready for love but I’m not closing my heart. After all, masarap sa pakiramdam ang love..:)
January 19, 2014 nung makita ko yung trailer nung movie. I feel inlove with the movie, agad agad, kaya sinabihan ko na agad si Anya, Jecai at CJ na papanoorin namin ‘to, sakto sa Valentine’s Day.:)
January 29, 2014, 10 days after, nagkita kami ni Jeff, ng hindi inaasahan. Matagal na kami hindi nagkikita, yung totoong kita, yung may kwentuhan, bilang magkaibigan. Nagkakasalubong kami paminsan sa mga SFC gatherings pero pinipili kong wag syang pansinin. Mas okay na sigurong walang nakakaalam na minahal ko sya bukod sa mga taong matagal na kaming kilala at sa mga taong malapit sa akin.
Tulad ni Ginny, natanong ko din sa sarili ko ‘to. For weeks, nagugulo ako ng tanong na yun. Mahirap sagutin. Lalo pa at may gf sya, tulad ni Marco sa movie na yun. Pero nasagot na kahapon (Feb. 15, 2014). Nanood na kami ng Starting Over Again, kaso wala si CJ kasi nasa CDO sya for the SFC ICON.
Minsan, kailangan mo ulit makita ang taong minahal mo sa nakaraan mo para magkaroon kayo ng closure. On my part, I believe kaya nagkita kami ulit kasi kinailangan ko na marealize na hindi na sya para sa akin. Kailangan ko na bitawan yung lahat ng nararamdaman ko sa kanya.
Palagi kong sinasabi, okay lang ako na hindi nya ako mahal, basta mahal ko sya, na hindi ako nasaktan ng nagkagirlfriend sya, na masaya pa nga ako kasi nagmamahal na sya. That’s not all true. At the back of my mind, in my heart, I am still hoping that he will learn to love me too, that eventually, he would realize that I was the one for him, nasaktan akong hindi ako ang nakagawa ng paraan para bumukas yung puso nya. I will regret not making him feel how much I love him. I will always love him. Pero sabi nga ni Marco, “I will always love you, but in a different way now.”
Nung nakita ko sya ulit. Bumalik lahat ng nararamdaman ko sa kanya, kasama pati kahihiyan at galit ko sa sarili ko. He is, really, that one guy, that can bring out everything in me, the best, including the worst in me. So maybe, it’s time to really let go of that love.
Just now, I unfriended him.Hindi pa kasi ako okay eh. I may be okay someday. Someday, just not now. I’m still thinking of disconnecting from other people connected with him but I think me and him, we’re always going to be connected because we are in the same community.
Someday, I’m going to meet the right person and I’m going to love him right.
And now I’m starting over again. I’m not saying I’m ready for love but I’m not closing my heart. After all, masarap sa pakiramdam ang love..:)
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