Day 2 of Journaling..

Today, I've noticed I am not as active as yesterday. I went back to bed again as I don't feel like moving today. But I have to get up and do something though.

I got up and went downstairs. I saw Mountain Dew as I was getting water in the refrigerator. It's cold but whatever. I want it. I want something sweet. I want cake too but I haven't bought one. I've been craving sinc4e last week but I won't buy since I'm so lazy, I don't have money and no one would buy for me. If only Alex is here.

At 2:30pm today, we met at Shakey's Buting to celebrate Grace's birthday tomorrow. We talked about the condition of her baby. Luna's (her baby's name) organs, not just her lungs, were not in the proper position. Apparently, TMC has declined for them to apply as a charity case. She's choosing between Makati Medical Hospital or St. Lukes Hospital in BGC. I told her to consider proximity since either way both of these hospitals have complete facilities for Luna and I believe St. Luke's is nearer to them since BGC is nearer to Buting than Makati Medical Hospital.

I was planning a baby shower for her also but I decided to forgo the big celebration. Simple nalang since baka nga kasi mangailangan sya ng help after delivery.

Nagtext nga pala yung fire volunteer na friend ni ate riah. Kukunin na daw yung donations since may sunod kanina sa Maybunga. Ok na rin. For donations nalang talaga yung mga yun. Ayoko na sila isuot.

I haven't landed a job. Akeem Murray has not messaged me yet regarding his feedback. I don't know if he liked my article. In the meantime, I found this website that caters to Filipino freelancers only.

I am trying to create a website with Wix. Some of the jobs in Upwork requires this skill or skill in creating a website, video editing, audio editing, copywriting, proofreading. I want to land a full-time writing job to be qualified to proofread. I believe I can do it but I just want writing experience first. I also wanted to write a book.

I used to believe that I love you was enough.

I used to believe that I love you was enough. And that if you both love each other it would be easy and it would be stupid to not be together. And that love is supposed to conquer everything. I must have been, somehow, bitter at the outcome of my first serious relationship. No matter how I tried to stay positive in life. I must have been angry all this time because I feel defeated and betrayed. I told my secrets. I bared myself. But I trusted the wrong person.

Love is enough. God is Love. God is enough.

I will never stop believing in love because that is what lead me to you and ultimately, to my true self. And it is what has got me through all this time. When I finally meet the person that is worthy of my trust and love, I would be ready, physically, emotionally and mentally. I hope the same for you.

I know I said it a hundred times, but I'll say it anyway. Thank you for allowing me to feel this when I'm still at my worst. I thought that you can never handle me even at my best. Thank you for making me realize my true self. Thank you for letting me go. Thank you for the times you made me feel loved. And thank you for making me part of your future even for a brief period.

I'd probably love you always in a certain way. I have built a future with you in it, It will take years to get you out of my system.